Friday, May 13, 2011

Five Minute Friday ~ Deep Breath


Deep breath....

But still my chest feels heavy. With grief. Soul-squashing, gut-wrenching, empty-hole type grief. It wells up without warning. Without a sound..... Forcing me to face it.

Deep breath.....

Screaming into the void my sorrow, my pain, my....what? My loss. The loss of what might have been. My little 8-week old child who was there. And now isn't. I ache. I miss. I lift my eyes to the heavens for help. For comfort.

Deep breath....

Taking my living baby, my Max, my joy....I step out into the morning mist to catch my breath. To remember life. To experience what God has given. To feel life. To allow the rhythm of grief to ease ever so slightly thanks to all of the new life around me... and there we see the fragrant peony beckoning us...the one from Grandpa's garden...a gift...

Deep breath....

Oh to be human. To appreciate the beauty, the grace, and yes.... even the pain of grief. How lucky we are to breathe it all in....


So here, in Lisa-Jo's words, is your invitation to join Five Minute Friday:

We’ve all got five minutes – while the kids are wrestling, while the macaroni’s boiling, while the dog is doing his business, while the plumber is resuscitating your washing machine.
Wanna just write? Without wondering if it’s just right or not. You’re welcome to play along. The rules are easy.
  1. Write your heart out for five minutes and show us what you’ve got.
  2. Tell your readers you’re linking up here and invite them to play along.
  3. And most importantly, go visit, read, and encourage the fellow five-minuter who linked up right before you.{I humbly beg you to turn off word verification for the day to make this easier!}


  1. I am so sorry for your loss. Max will one day welcome you to heaven. Love is eternal. God bless you.

  2. Oops. Sorry Patti...I luckily still have Max (pictured above)! :) I was talking about the baby I lost a few weeks ago.... (But yes, I know that we will be greeted by that baby, along with the other one that we lost....and love is indeed eternal.) Thank you for coming by.

  3. ((hugs)) So very sorry for your loss. Love the way your wrote this today.

  4. This is a beautifully written post Mary Jo. I will continue to send up prayers for you and your family. May the peace and love of God wash over you and ease the ache.

  5. I cannot imagine such loss and pain. Thank you for sharing so honestly. Your post moved me.

  6. Hey Mary...ur baby boy is so cute:) U knw dear I visited so many blogs today, and somehow m stunned to see what all ppl have gone through...but yet I would like to say that it's indeed commendable that like many others, we have this belief in God which takes us forward, every time we wish to fall, he helps us get up....Really sorry for ur loss.It indeed means a lot to lose a child. But hey, u knw what the best thing is ur baby still smiles at u, loves u and thanks u thru the morning sunshine, theru the cool twilight and as u close ur eyes lets u knw that u were a great mother:)
    Here's my blog:

  7. Hey, Mary Jo. Such a beautiful remembrance of your baby. Praying for you today, friend.

  8. You are loved. I am so sorry, because this grief hurts. It rolls in like a wave, and then rolls out like the tide, only to roll back in again. I have been praying for you when you come to mind. Blessings upon you.

  9. I am truly sorry for your loss.
    Those flowers that come from somewhere special can be heartlifting in their own way- if only for a little while.


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